This past year God has taught us more about love than any other. Not so much about loving each other (although that’s a certainty), but more of what it is to love Him.
The night the mass in Meg’s head was found and we were transferred to Omaha Children’s, Meg had it right. She sang Jesus Loves Me over and over. All I could do was stare ahead at the road, breathing shuddered breaths.
The day it downpoured in Texas she told me, “God knows we don’t always like the storms but he knows when we need the rain."
Hours after being released from the hospital following open brain surgery, Meg laid propped up in a heap of pillows falling to sleep singing “I love you God, I just wanted you to know, I love you” with tears still on her cheeks.
In John 21:17, Jesus asks Peter, “Do you love Me?”
Over and over again, this same question seems to lurk in our lives. It comes during the hardest times, when pain is real and heartache steals our breath.
Meg’s love for God reminds me how simple it can be.
God never asks me to answer what I’m going to do, what’s going to happen, how I will handle it when it does. He doesn’t ask how things make me feel or what I’d rather not go through.
His question to me, "Do you love Me?", answers everything.
Life has a way of aligning when we know the answer. When we show the answer. When we live it when it’s the hardest to live.
His question changes my life. His words remind me of His love for me. There’s little room to second guess what He’s doing, why He’s allowed what He has, if He cares or is concerned. His love shows me how much He is for me. How He wants me to succeed. There’s bigger purposes than what I see.
How beautiful would it be for my answer to always be joyful? But the reality is there’s times I’ve answered through clenched teeth. Times I’ve answered crying. Times I don’t know how or why or if I deserve to answer at all.
Jesus gets it.
It’s why He asks a simple question. He longs to know even when it hurts and we don’t understand, what our answer will be.