I got up this morning thankful to be taking Meg to her kindergarten checkup. I overlooked it was also a pre-op appointment since she’ll be put to sleep for tests next week. It felt like we were heading in the right direction, one step closer to normal.
Then Meg woke up. As I mindlessly stepped over her laying in the hallway, I felt what our sense of normal is.
When I take myself into consideration I start to feel things aren’t as they should be. This all becomes not good enough. I see how far off target life is. I look at the widening distance and my resistance becomes stronger and stronger. I compare it to what life used to be like. How I want it to be. How I can try to make it go.
But the last 2 years have shown me - it’s not how God would have it.
God calls us away from what we know so we can become what we never were before.
What stands on the side of life, is willingness. A desperate need for God to take what’s left and do something with it.
He always does.
A lot of times it doesn’t look like it. Sometimes it doesn’t feel like it. But His love and truth saturate everything.
As we got ready to leave, the kids were talking about adventure parks. Evan said he wanted to go to Disneyland. Meg's eyes were full of disbelief as she asked him, "Don't you know how much better heaven is?"
While it was still sinking in, my little girl wants to go to heaven instead of Disneyland, Evan dropped his backpack on the floor. He walked over and put his arms around Meg and said, "You're right Meg. Heaven is so much better."
While it's hard to be called away from the life we knew, I've come to see more every day how much we'd be missing if we didn't have this life. As long as He's our normal, it couldn't be greater.